The (NOT SO) Skinny Girl

 So the title of this post is a little misleading if you don't have some background info. 3 MILLENIAL WOMEN, in very different places in their lives- both literally and figuratively- walk into a bar... sort of.  This past week, despite Covid-19 still looming, I had the wonderful opportunity to spend time with two of my best friends. All in our 30s, all living in different states, all leading very different lifestyles. The two  East Coast gals rode together to the very start of the 'Mid West' to re-unite with the 3rd... it had probably been years since the 3 of us were together like this.  Just a little background info on the 3 women, to set the scene J1- 33, lives in NJ with her husband, daughter (2), baby #2 on the way, and dog. Has a bachelor's degree, owns her own business and works for herself, joint owns a house and car with her immigrant hubby who does white collar work in the budding cannabis industry (pun intended). J2- 32, lives in Mass. Never married, has 2...

Maybe it's just me and my upbringing, I mean Italian mothers/grandmothers are top notch at laying on the guilt. God forbid you made ANY plans on a Sunday, or any other day designated as a family day, that didn't include getting together at Mom or Grandma's house for a 3 course (or more) army-sized meal. As I grew up and became aware and independent, I felt 'guilt' more and more. Not just for not spending time with family. For not thanking them enough. For not doing enough around the house. For not offering to do enough. For not having better grades or being better at something. For not having enough money for things. All sorts of guilt. I've carried this childhood notion of always feeling guilty about everything into my married, established, adult life.  Interestingly enough, where I thought it was just a "ME" thing, I'm starting to realize our culture, as a whole, is very geared towards placing guilt on people unnecessarily. It comes in a lot o...

There is EVIL in this world. There is no situational ethics involved here... it is not comprehensible what leads people to this kind of evil. Since the beginning of time, there have been bad people doing bad things because EVIL lives among us. It is part of the world, in equality with the parts of LOVE and GOODNESS. 58 people(do not count the vile creature that did this) lost their lives while trying to enjoy themselves- while relaxing, having fun... and less than an hour after joining together as a crowd to sing "GOD BLESS AMERICA". I was appalled, I was sick to my stomach, I was panicked, I was sad, I was angry. I am 2,555 miles away from this tragedy. Every side in America cares deeply about the lives lost in this tragedy, we just have different solutions to this kind of ...thing. This kind of event. This kind of horrible, tragic disaster. We all care about what happened in Vegas- we all just disagree about the policy. The 2nd amendment, when writte...

I posted this one year ago on my FB page. Little did I know that within a year, everyone would be trying to tell everyone else how to live 100% worse than they were at that moment in time. What do I mean? "Accept trans people, let them use your bathroom, and don't call them by any pronouns associated with any specific gender" "Accept feminists, listen to their rants, support them as they protest, pay for their birth control" "Accept pro-choice supporters, because you're a woman and you should know we should have the only control over our own bodies. If that means everyone in the country chips in for our birth control and medical well-being and abortions, so be it. We have the right to choose" "Accept illegal aliens, let them live here free of national responsibility, pay for their medical, send their kids to the schools you pay for, don't alienate them" "Accept fat people, don't act like their lifestyle is unhealthy,...

This is a serious topic of discussion on 'the right'. Not even the far right... the center right. The " 68 % conservatives", the "Centrists", the "Young Outsiders", and the "Somewhat Liberals".  I don't know what the spectrum is for "political or world views" but I'd have to say I hang to the right and the conservative. Which sounds so weird, because CONSERVATIVE is not really a word I'd  ever  use to describe myself. But I talked about this in past blog posts... today's topic is, are people on the FAR LEFT suffering from mental illness? My psychologist sister would have you believe that everyone suffers from some form of mental illness in varying degrees. I suffer from anxiety which induces depression. FUN! The anxiety is inherited, the depression is what occurs when you stop learning how to cope with new or prolonged anxiety inducing situations. Anxiety is a product of chemical imbalance, it can be trea...

If you're an American woman, 3/8/17 is "A Day Without Women", modeled after "A Day Without Immigrants". HERE WE GO AGAIN  (I almost sound like Graham Allan ).... The website for International Women's Day challenges you to "call on yourself to help forge a better working world". The organizers behind the January "Women's March on Washington" have also organized and planned walkouts, rallies and marches dubbed "A Day Without a Woman".Women are not only encouraged to stay home from [paid] work, but also to (if socially and economically able to do so) abstain from [unpaid]housework and child care, and shop only at small, women-owned businesses. So basically... shirk all of your responsibilities in general  and go shopping   to make a point.  NO RESPONSIBILITY NO ACCOUNTABILITY NO F**KS GIVEN.... Men are being asked to help with caregiving and other domestic chores on Wednesday. They are also being encouraged to rally f...

So tax season is in full swing. My documents are in the queue to be processed and filed with my accountant. Which brings me to my first point of discussion.... using an actual person (accountant) to do your taxes vs. Turbo tax (or other electronic self-filing program). -If you are outraged that wealthy people (including Trump) get 'unfair' tax breaks, what have you done to remedy your own situation? Have you read up on tax law lately? Do you know the ins and outs of the system? Do you know how to make it work for you? Do you know the secrets of the trade? NO?! THEN WHY THE  F**K  ARE YOU USING A SELF GUIDED PROGRAM TO COMPLETE YOUR TAXES? -If you think that having a professional do your taxes is too expensive, and would rather let a cheap or free program assist you, then why are you crying that you don't make out on your taxes? -If you cry year after year about how your 'return' turns out... why aren't you seeking additional guidance/assistance? Why are yo...

I have said it before and I will say it again-- BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD. Be it. Do it. Take action. "Teacher tell student 'you and your parents are getting deported'... is this Trump's America?" If we are blaming Trump for the teacher's actions.... If there are people out there blaming Trump for their actions, those people are a huge part of the problem. Those people are the ones inciting fear. Anyone who blames other people for the way they act or present themselves or treat others is a problem. And I feel that problem gets fixed by starting at HOME. Since when did we stop teaching kindness, and equality at HOME. Since when did we stop preaching accountability and respect at HOME? Because all the little a-holes running around running their mouths and not respecting other people, bullying other people, forcing their views on other people, blaming other people are more of a problem than the one man the majority of America e...

I guess I should say that YES I DO CARE... however there is more we can DO to fix our problems. We can start a revolution, by educating ourselves and our offspring. We can start a movement with deep roots. We can change the way we act to the world, and thus influence the way they act towards us. We can eliminate our problems, not just for ourselves- but for future generations. We can train, nurture, and produce better human beings than we have. We can do this- we can make the difference. Will you be the one to take the first step?

Dear President Donald Trump, Congrats ..... Now that you've made it this far, we need to talk. I need to implore you.... You have a responsibility now, to the whole country. This is not an acquisition. You cannot do whatever you want now. Everything you do now represents America as a whole. America put you here in this position. We, Americans, picked you. “If Donald Trump really wants to be president of all Americans, then I think his first duty is to fill in the deep rifts which arose during the campaign,”  Foreign Minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier of Germany, a country where Mr. Trump is deeply unpopular, appealed for reconciliation. We also picked Mike pence. We liked him- We liked you guys as a team. Please please listen to him. Use his knowledge. Use him as a sounding board. Pick a wonderful cabinet, surround yourself with knowledgeable people. Do the right thing. Make this election outcome something to be remembered. Please move forward with tact . You said you wou...

This may be one of the most (bizarre) significant elections of all time for America. The two major parties have both put forward "controversial" figures. One is a man, one is a woman. One is a lawyer turned politician, one is a business man not familiar with the ins and outs of politics. One has disappointed the majority of the American people publicly, the other has disappointed the minority of American people privately. Both are vying for every single person in America's VOTE. ...........AND  THEN.......... There's the two other options- Libertarian Gary Johnson and Green Party Jill Stein. Oh wait, you're an American and didn't know you had other options? Oh wait, you are a foreigner and didn't know we had other options? (As you've been scoffing at us and feeling bad for us having to choose the lesser of two evils...) Do you know what I'm tired of? -Mudslinging - going after the "little guys", minorities, and groups of people...

Trump says that if he was President, Hillary would be in jail.  People are saying that's a threat. So the question I posed to the old interwebs is: Why is it a threat when half the country is wondering why she's not there already?!?!?!?! And then someone gets ballsy and says "Actually not really, you must not have seen the recent polls" ACTUALLY- YES REALLY. Because, if you stand by the statement you just made, then you are clearly brainwashed by the media and not thinking for yourself. According to the polls, there are only two candidates. According to the polls, the numbers don't equal 100. According to the polls, each media outlet has different information coming through them. Here's my summary of the polls: A little more than half the country who's being accounted for likes Hillary, a little less than half the country likes Trump, and then there's a whole portion who's  UNACCOUNTED FOR. Please don't think that because she "pulled ...

"If you don't believe the same thing I believe, you're wrong and I don't like you and we can't be friends." That's not how America was founded. That seems to be how many people think now-a-days. Everyone is offended. Everyone is a tyrant forcing their own views on people. Everyone is wearing blinders. No one can have a conversation anymore, let along a debate. NORMAL PEOPLE cannot discus ideas and ethics and politics without getting ANGRY. People are threatening to do harm to other people for voicing their opinions. I'm sorry but I thought I live in the country that promises me life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, a gun to protect myself, and freedom of speech. The citizens of America are steadily making this NOT SO. Not the politicians. The every day Joe Schmoes who tell you to "STFU and find a hole to die in" because you made a comment on a Facebook post. The people who call you an inbred and a tranny and a retard over yo...

So I was watching the Patriot's game last night and during the National Anthem I said to my husband "while this whole Kaepernick thing is going on, someone somewhere thought this- DO YOU STAND IN YOUR HOME OR IN YOUR LOCAL WATERING HOLE WHEN THE NATIONAL ANTHEM PLAYS WHILE YOU'RE WATCHING A SPORTING EVENT AT YOUR LEISURE??? " And there we all are, in our homes, sitting in a Lay-Z-boy or laying on the couch... looking at the faces on the screen and judging them by what they are doing. Seeing who's standing, who's kneeling, who's doing what. And what do we really care? Why do we really care? Why does the media blow it up? Why does the camera instinctively cut to two players thrusting their fists in the air at the end of the song - is that a black panther salute??? Are we offended??? The narrators had it right... "These days everyone is trying to make a statement, and they're doing it during or around the national anthem". That was all. ...

People may not realize that the top of one of those "twin" towers was the biggest cell phone antenna in the whole city. Or that cell service went out after the 1st plane hit. Imagine that today. We are all so glued to our phones, imagine actually NEEDING THEM because there was a traumatic event going on and you needed help, or were looking for someone you knew, or were trying to tell someone you were OK.  Fifteen years ago on that fateful day my Daddy was called into action.  No he's not a police man, a firefighter, he's not national guard or search and rescue.  He's just an electrician, and he was T-Mobile's go-to guy in NJ/NYC for temporary cell service sites.  You bet your ass he had an important job to get in there and do- restore cell service to the great city as it was in its darkest moments.  He went in while people were scrambling to get out. He had to climb in and on the wreckage surrounding what is now known as "ground zero", and se...