The (NOT SO) Skinny Girl

When you are pregnant, everyone realizes- KNOWS- that you are giving up your body for another. Your body will change. You will probably gain weight, lose bone density, gain longer more luxurious locks, and lose your abs.Your whole shape may change, with wider hips and bigger (often saggier) boobs. But post birth, your body doesn't just snap back. It takes weeks, months, YEARS. Not just for your tummy, but your hips area, your boob area, your back, your ankles. Immediately, I felt the pain of the epidural. It's 10.5 months down the road, and sometimes I still do. It's getting much better. It was pretty bad for the first 6 months. My back hurt all the time as I hunched over, breastfeeding. As I bent to lift the carrier or a sock off the ground.  After 2 months, my scar was healed, but it was far from gone. It was(is) still slightly red, a glaring reminder that they cut me to save my baby. I could still feel it up until probably 6 months.  My feet were swollen for 3 wee...

The struggle is real. I know it. Anyone else ranging from "I have a few pounds to spare" to "I'm morbidly obese and I don't know what to do" knows it.  The moment you try to make that change, where you decide to restrict intake and calories and carbs and sugars... That is the moment that those things become all that you can think about. I want pizza, I want bagels, I want chocolate bars, I want cookies for the 3pm snack instead of a cheese stick. I want a can of soda instead of a 10th glass of water. I want to think I can have one mini size piece of chocolate and it won't ruin my day.  I want 3 sugars in my coffee and 1/4 cup of half and half, black coffee is depressing.  I want to eat haphazardly like my husband and forego walks or workouts. How does he look so fit when he eats pizza and pierogis and bread, bread, bread?! He must be an alien, there's no other explanation. But let's calm our minds, let's rant & then get over i...

So it's interesting that the name of this blog is "Not so Skinny Jazzy". I immediately regretted that when I posted my first non-weight loss inspired post. I literally just counted - out of 175 entries, about 13 are about weight loss. Pretty much the first 13 that were written in the 30 days I was doing the strict 30 days of the Isagenix diet. And I look at myself and realize I will have to start that strict 30 again. I will have to start dieting and exercising at least moderately. Since I first started this blog, I have blown up like a balloon. I have never weighed so much in my life, not even with freshman 15 and a fetus inside me. I weigh 145lbs. My "happy weight" (based on BMI) is like 122. Let me interject here- this is exactly why I call myself "not so skinny Jazzy".... There are some people who would say "I wish I weighed 145lbs" and scoff at me and make me feel bad for my feelings. My own family has done this throughout the years. A...

For a very long time I felt this way and now someone has put it into beautiful words and made a song. Let it be an anthem for anyone who feels this way... (note I crossed out the parts that don't pertain to me) She just wants to be beautiful She goes unnoticed, she knows no limits, She craves attention, she praises an image, She prays to be sculpted by the sculptor Oh she don't see the light that's shining Deeper than the eyes can find it Maybe we have made her blind So she tries to cover up her pain, and cut her woes away 'Cause covergirls don't cry after their face is made But there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark You should know you're beautiful just the way you are And you don't have to change a thing The world could change its heart No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving You know, "Covergirls eat nothing." She says, "Be...

So I had been talking to my cousin about this cleansing thing. We were recently walking on the beach just chatting about it. I didn't want to push it. I know her financial situation, but I also was listening to her talk about her body and her eating habits and her unhappiness.  And I mean I'm no sales person. BUT this is the first shake program I stuck to and it worked. The others, 30 days and no real results. This one was a little more expensive which is probably why I started with the other ones. But you truly do get what you pay for. I paid to lose 8lbs. . .To break a plateau. . . To gain energy. . . To see results. I got it. You can too. I had a long conversation with my cousin last night. I told her about my journey with Isagenix. People are always asking me "Why are you on a diet?" Why not I say- because YOU think I'm skinny? Because you think I'm petite? I'm on a diet because it seemed like the easiest thing to change- there were plenty of t...

Nope- it's not a Poke'mon (don't get me started on that subject). EVOO- Extra Virgin Olive oil. Delicious for dipping bread, on salads, on pasta, helps your pasta not stick to the sides of the pot, etc etc. An Italian staple in culinary delights. Also- great beauty care product. My hair is dyed, and recently looked really fried. UH OH. NO bueno to walk around looking like you stuck your finger in a socket. So I did the unthinkable. I added oil to it. EVOO to be exact. I just poured it in and massaged it into every strand. Then wrapped it in a towel and went to bed. Wash it out in the morning. Day one was a little better, but the roots looked slimy so I hit it with some dry shampoo. Did it for the second night in a row- and BAM !! There's my healthy looking hair! )yes, I hit it with a little more dry shampoo- tip: stay away from the roots lol) I also have been putting it on my face after cleansing (and right before bed to be specific). I make sure that in the morni...

Ya know- there's just something that is refreshing about the idea of cleansing.  Cleansing of your sins, cleansing your colon, cleansing your news feed or friends list. Cleaning out your closet/garage/car. Finding all this stuff that has literally been DRAGGING YOU DOWN. People drag you down: Toxic people. Liars. Selfish people. People who are only your friend when its most convenient to them. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram- all full of fake friends and "followers". My mother always told me not to be a follower, that is why I don't do twitter or Instagram or snap. I don't follow people. I'm not a lost puppy. And I try to go through facebook often and see who I could give a f**k less about that is probably just dead weight. "OMG I have 912 friends!" I ran into one of my Facebook "friends" the other day... they acted like they didn't even know me. A very awkward "ooooh hey..." and walked away. Sweet. [delete] #cleanse Objects...

Try this recipe out P.A.M.   or Pineapple, Apple and Mint. It should just be called Y.U.M. I could bathe in this stuff. ·           1/3 of a pineapple  ·           2 large green apples  ·            A few pinches of mint (don’t add too much, or it’ll overpower the other flavors) Don't forget to strain it out if "cleansing" (not supposed to eat 'solids') Sounds freakin awesome! I hear that when your muscles are sore, Pineapple is a good recover food. Green apples boost metabolism. Mint is just dandy. How can you go wrong with this??

Let's talk about discrimination. Let's talk about judgement. Let's talk about HATE. I am white, female, Christian, American, Catholic, short, loud, outgoing, fun, cute, educated, loving. I have big hopes and dreams, I have educated and yet provocative thoughts and outlooks. I have swagger, I have style, I have a personality. I feel the HATE more than the love. I see how people look at me, I have heard how they perceive me. I have felt the sting of discrimination.  And yet there are so many people out there who would never believe that I too have felt singled out for my thoughts/beliefs/actions/being. To some, I'm as normal as it gets. To some, I stick out like a sore thumb. To some, I blend in or am "tolerable". To some, I stand out or "should be avoided at all costs". Sometimes I feel like people look at me and think I'd be a bad influence. And sometimes I feel like people want to be me. In today's day and age, you have to be a her...

SO, I paid big bucks for 30 days of Isagenix- And then I get outside the "Strict 30" and find myself back where I began: Eating like crap. Bloated. Gaining weight. Sluggish. It's hard to be "strict", it's hard to say no, it's even hard to make healthier choices. I know- I did it! McDonald's or Little Cesars is easy and cheap. Getting a drink 2+ nights a week is fun! Making healthy lunches the night before is often a hassle. :/ Excuses are easy to make. So little by little I try to remember something I learned- like hey, instead of that chocolate bar, eat an Isadelight and it will satisfy that craving and not throw your whole day off. If you haven't packed lunch, go with something safe when you pick something up- when in doubt a salad with some grilled chicken will get you by. Drink as much water as you possibly can because water will fill that void that you think should be filled with free pastries or chips. If you don't wanna/can...

So, everyday at lunch I go for a walk with my coworker/friend.  And we talk about life, love, and the pursuit of happiness.  We "talk shop"- work related things. We "talk boys"- about my husband and her boyfriend.  We walk, we talk, it's really refreshing.  But (almost) every day we have a nice little awkward chuckle about one thing... people who honk at us as we are walking. Minding our own businesses. *HONK!* It usually seems to be some sort of blue collar workers in a truck or van. And we have started coming up with reasons why they do this: - They think we look good (obvs) - They fantasize about a white-collar woman - They think white collar women fantasize about the blue-collared guy who's going to fix all their 'problems' - They're dirty old men - They think it's the ultimate compliment - They want us to know we were noticed These are all legit reasons. We are still debating whether it's rude, disgusting, kinda fu...

The only thing to make me smile today is when someone told me I look thin and that she guesses the Isagenix is working out for me. Yes, if nothing else- that has worked out for me. I put on pants this morning that I have not worn in probably 6 months. And I made a conscious decision to pack strict 30 approved lunch and snacks, and did not forget to prep my dinner shake for later. There's a bright side to every seemingly bad day. I should be grateful my pup is feeling better too- He's battling kennel cough. I may not be able to carry a human child within me, but my furbaby really makes me feel like a MOM. I am looking forward to getting to the farm and galloping the polo ponies out on the polo field. It's like 84 degrees out (which is glorious in my eyes). Silver linings my friends. Silver linings are all over. If you want to know more about my bad day- leave a comment. I have not gotten 1 comment yet and I would love to get feedback about what I am posting and how...

Official numbers after 30 days are: Weight lost: 7.5lbs Inches lost: 16 (not sure if I did this right- please comment if you know I did NOT) Body fat: -3.5% BMI: still in normal range Here's my progress tracking worksheet for reference. I have no idea why I forgot to log my 18th day results...

There are 25,915 days in the life of the average human.  How will you honor the great gift (body) you’ve been given? Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Moments so dear Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes How Do You Measure - Measure A Year? In Daylights - In Sunsets In Midnights - In Cups Of Coffee In Inches - In Miles In Laughter - In Strife In - Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes How Do You Measure A Year In The Life?

SO I think I started this on May 13th... And it's amazing to think that I'm almost done being " STRICT " . AKA RESTRICTING myself. And I think that's what people don't like about dieting. That they have to "restrict" themselves. But let's look at it logically- overindulging got you where you are. Eating the whole box of girl scout cookies in one sitting (guilty), having 6 pieces of pizza, getting a fried appetizer before your meal (which you know will be more than you can eat because you come here all the time), getting multiple sugary drinks while out for the night. All sorts of scenarios where, in your head, you say "Why not? I do what I want!". Believe me, I say that! ALL THE TIME- ask my husband. I get it. But when you wake up after 2, 3, 6 months of this behavior and you say "how could I gain XX amount of weight", deep down you know the answer. We live in a culture (Americana) where more is BAE. Bigger is better. I w...

So I heard you can actually do 3 2-day cleanses in a 30 day period. Music to my ears! After 2 weekends of a little edible promiscuity, I could use it. I mean, I spent a lot on this product line!! I've been trying, but not hard enough. So, I wanted to wash away my inequities. Cleanse me of that wonderful fare I enjoyed every bite of while on vacation. Clean me out one more time so I can (and everyone else if they want to) see the results of this heralded product. So again, I cleanse. Note- don't feel bad for me, it's not that bad. I'll be happy when it's over, though!

I'd like to say that when I started this weight loss thing almost 30 days ago (I had hoped I would have a full 30 days under my belt by June 3rd when I left for vacation but alas, shipping did not allow for it) it was with the intention to be at my wedding day weight of 120-122 (not quite sure, hotels don't have scales!!) by today. Reality is, I am nowhere near that. I am lucky if I am at 130 today. -not enough exercise? -too much 'cheating'? (terrible word to use while writing about a wedding anniversary....) -Belly fat is harder to lose than other fats?? But instead of being negative- like so much of the world is ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME- I'm going to look at the positives.   *My husband and I have been married 1 full year. *We have not killed each other. Although I almost burn the apartment building down every time I cook. *Every day he tells me I'm beautiful just the way I am. He says if I want to lose weight, it is for ME. Not every woman can say...

Today I got up at the crack of dawn to embarq on an adventure . Hubby and I are celebrating 1 year of marriage in Newport RI. Being we are both raised in NJ, got married on a NJ beach, and have never been to Newport before, you may ask how we ended up there. YES We literally randomly selected it. We decided that since we got married on a beach, each year we will visit a different beach for our anniversary. We are clearly starting on the east Coast :) To date, together we have been up and down the Jersey coast, we have been to Ocean City Maryland, we have been to Daytona Beach FL, we have been to Jones Beach NY, we've been to Cancun, we've been to Capri and Sorrento. There are probably more but they evade me. So Newport RI won out this year because it's a lively port town and it was only about a 3 hour drive so perfect for a long weekend. I say that now since we just got in the car... Mind you, I almost brought my Bullet Blender with me to mix up my shakes. I have 3 can...

The question is- is getting skinny while trying to (or thinking about) getting pregnant futile? I mean, you will just gain weight while pregnant, right? I think there is no simple answer. I FEEL THAT (and most doctors would agree) no one should gain 80 freakin' pounds in their face, arms, thighs, and ass while pregnant. That is just the result of using pregnancy as an excuse to eat whatever you want and not think about the consequences. It may feel awesome to eat yourself into oblivion and blame it on the child growing inside of you- oh yes, I get it, you're "eating for 2"- but in reality that's not the truth. When you are pregnant, you should be just as aware IF NOT MORE about what you are putting into your body BECAUSE IT IS ULTIMATELY ENDING UP IN YOUR CHILD'S BODY. That being said, I read an article about two pregnant friends that had very different pregnancies. The model on the left is 4 months pregnant and her friend on the right is 5 months pregn...

At least I can point out my flaws. I know the reasons I'm "disappointed in myself" again and again when it comes to weight loss. *Mimosas on Sundays *Bacon and egg bread pudding *Long Islands on rooftops *Wawa subs because you need something quick to put in your belly so you can keep drinking  *Red bull or Monster because you need energy since you got up at 6am and are trying to go hard until 2am *Shots of Fireball because you spun the shot wheel and won a round Normal people (ages 20-25 mostly) can do things like this. People who aren't happy with their bodies and buy into expensive products, should not. People who sometimes care but kinda really don't can do them too... Sunday: 6am wake-up to go ride the horses. Home by 10. Dressed and out the door by 11. Pick up friend, drive into NYC, somehow find parking on the street in the meatpacking district. Walk up to where it says the restaurant should be but there's nothing, not even a sign. Walk up and d...